Community: as defined by dictionary.com

1) A social group of any size whose members reside in a specific locality, share government, and often have a common cultural and historical heritage.

2) A locality inhabited by such a group.

3) A social, religious, occupational, or other group sharing common characteristics or interests and perceived or perceiving itself as distinct in some respect from the larger society within which it exists (usually prec. by the): the business community; the community of scholars.

There you go, the 3 prime definitions of community. I can’t argue and don’t have any problem with any part of them. I don’t remember what made me think of the idea of community and what it means to me. But once I started I couldn’t stop so I decided to start writing it down. It’s what I do.

I grew up in a small town. There is, or at least was then, a strong sense of community in that place. From the daily newspaper covering school events to the relationships that were built and maintained between people of all ages it was a community. Looking back now, I loved it. I was a relatively high profile member of the community considering I was just a teenager. But I knew how to make it work for me. I networked and smiled and shook hands and played nice and stayed out of trouble. These are people that get together to help each other when someone is in need. They knit and bake for the Christmas bazaar season. They show up by the thousand (and there are only 15,000 or so) for the fall fair and Float Your Fanny Down The Ganny every year regardless of the weather. And they are proud to be from Port Hope, ON. I’m proud to have been from there too.

But now I live in Toronto. In a small apartment in a neighbourhood that isn’t known for hospitality and togetherness. It makes me miss Port Hope and it makes me dream of a small town again when it’s time to do the family thing. I want my kids to know what community feels like. And I don’t feel it right now.

However, I have felt community in a city before. That was in Ottawa. It was with a group of people that were my friends and pseudo family and support group and enablers and my community. We sang together, drank together, laughed, cried, played, fought and lived together. If someone needs something in that group you can pretty much bet that someone will help them out. I miss them. They know that.

The other kind of community that I’ve found is online. Maybe it sounds lame or geeky but it’s the truth. On Twitter I have a community of Montreal Canadiens fans that I love talking hockey with. As a group we had an amazing spring as our favourite team shocked the hockey world. We are spread out all over Canada and the United States. There are men and women of all ages. French or English speaking, we don’t care. If you love the Habs and want to talk hockey, come and join us. When the team won games we cheered and celebrated together. When they lost we stayed strong and reminded each other that it was okay. And even now that the Canadiens season is over we are in touch every day, talking hockey and every day life. We have a shared interest and pride in what makes us different from other hockey fans and we support each other however and whenever we can. That makes us a community.

Likewise I have found myself a community of writers. People from all over the place that write what about every subject. These people are passionate, smart, funny, creative and supportive. I will be honest and say that I feel that I have received much more support than I have given. But when and if the opportunity arises I will be there however I can. We link each other’s blogs. We comment and praise and thank each other. I have yet to see someone get hung out to dry. These people are hard at work and still taking the time to talk to me. They make me feel like part of a community. I like it a lot. I hope those opportunities to either pay friends back or pay it forward present themselves to me.

I guess what I’ve been getting to throughout all of this is that community isn’t just one thing or one option or one opportunity. There are many kinds and options and the best part is that you can be part of as many communities you want. And I feel lucky and privileged to be part of the communities that I am in.

And here’s my thought for all of you. When you feel lonely or sad or are in need, remember that you aren’t alone. Reach out and find those people in your community. We’ll be here for you.

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Joshua Murray

creator of content, daddy blogger, writer, coffee drinker, fan of the Batman. proud mo bro. prouder dad.